Halo: Infinite’s multiplayer beta is nearing the end of its first weekly event and I cannot get over how goddamn lonely 343 Industries has managed to make a multiplayer game. A series known for a bustling community has been reduced to an excellent video game choked underneath a thick layer of tried and true moneymaking tactics. In the olden days one could boot up Halo for hours of fun, joining naturally-forming micro-communities and potentially making friends with complete strangers. Halo: Infinite is the online multiplayer equivalent of walking around a dead mall. Sure, there’s technically other people there, but it stands as more of a reminder of times when the area thrived.Continue reading “Halo: Infinite Isolation”
Twelve hours into DRAGO Entertainment’s newest release Gas Station Simulator I find myself at a crossroads. The first few hours are a wild ride that seems to buck the trend of the asset-flip homogenous “simulator” game genre, only to fall to pieces as its flashy mechanics degrade into annoyances to be automated or outright ignored. In those opening hours it’s better than the rank-and-file barely-functioning “[Insert Job] Simulator” games, but what points it earns with moxie it loses to unpolished jankiness and an insidious dark secret. Welcome to a 4,300 word review of a $20 game you’ve barely hard of.Continue reading “Gas Station Simulator: A Pit Stop from Bland “Simulators””
Every YouTuber and their communist lesbian mother has talked about Bo Burnham’s quarantine “comedy” special Inside by this point. Not a damn one I’ve found so far has talked about one of the most obvious pieces of visual symbolism that feels specifically targeted at content creators, so here’s a blog about that.Continue reading “The Abyss Stares Back – Inside Bo Burnham’s Camera”
No, this is isn’t a tell-all YouTube drama video about myself, although that’d be pretty wild.
A quick glance up above will show the domain of this particular blog has changed. While partially motivated by the fact I’m no longer attending Podcast Movement 2021 and am in the mood to make impulse purchases to quell the sadness, there’s a method to this madness.Continue reading “The death of The Pod Report.”
Yes, this isn’t podcast-related, but I argue always-online podcasters/freelancers/content creators in particular are probably in need of some good things to distract from the world outside. There’s many phenomenal lists written by phenomenal people showcasing hopepunk, comedy, and general escapist podcasts, this list covers things that do that for me when my brain isn’t in the mood for audio alone.Continue reading “Chill YouTube for When You Just Need a Bit of a Break”
One of the ways I offset some of my podcasting overhead is by freelance reviewing music for a small publication. Since I’ve had this job for over a year now I have a hearty backlog of reviews from my listening to at least four new albums per month. Let’s dive into the backlog and look at the worst examples, be they downright offensive or just bland wasted potential.Continue reading “The Nine Worst Albums of 2018 (according to me)”
One of the ways I offset some of my podcasting overhead is by freelance reviewing music for a small publication. Since I’ve had this job for over a year now I have a hearty backlog of reviews from my listening to at least four new albums per month. Let’s dive into the backlog and look at the best of the best! Presented in no particular order.
Universal Studios has set this movie up for failure among critics by launching a marketing campaign that feels like they had a bunch of slogans for a second wave of Grumpy Cat ads that never came to be and just slapped the Grinch’s face on it. Yesterday I enjoyed a stack of green pancakes while sitting in the shade of an Ihop window vinyl with the words “I’m not impressed” next to that smarmy looking green fuck.
The next day I was crying over a nice thing that smarmy green fuck did in his movie, so there’s that. Continue reading “The Grinch (2018): The marketing sucks, I still cried.”
For the two of you who haven’t seen me running around hat in hand on Twitter, I’ve started a monthly newsletter! All the other cool kids are putting out newsletters, it felt like just the kind of thing to motivate me to get some writing done on a regular basis. What follows is a fun section from last month’s publication! Continue reading “Three Awesome Episodes: A Newsletter Excerpt”
A secret weapon of many podcasters and voice actors on a budget is the acoustic box (or mic box or whatever random-ass name someone has come up with for their YouTube tutorial). At its core the concept is simple: take a box, line the inside with foam to deaden any sound bouncing around, thus giving a more professional-sounding final product. No more need to drop dollars on acoustic foam tiles that make ones’ bedroom look like they’re trying to be the next hot YouTube gamer. Continue reading “The DIY acoustic box that only cost $10 (and my dignity)”